Summer to New Beginnings

Well I'm about a week and some change away from the start of my senior year of undergrad, and it drawing near means that this summer is coming to an end. This summer has been a very interesting and hugely productive one. I completed two summer classes, the first in 3 weeks, and the second in 2. In those 5 weeks all I did was work. I did learn a lot, which is good, but didn't get to have much of a life. Then I went to an orchestra camp in North Carolina. In going I wasn't quite sure what to expect, but it turned out to be wonderful. This would be a good time to let you know that I play oboe, thus what I was at orchestra camp for. Anyway, so, before going to camp I had been having some confidence issues. At the beginning of summer I took a lesson with one of the leading oboe teachers and was put in my place. It was good, because I needed to know where I stood, but bad because the small percentage of confidence I did have was gone. Somehow I managed to keep going, and when I got to the camp I wasn't sure what was going to come of it, but at my placement audition I nailed my piece and ended up getting the principal part on the hardest piece of the first concert!! I was ecstatic but more nervous than anything. I was put on a pedestal, but was I going to shine or whither? Well I did some shining! So much that I lit a fire in myself that will hopefully propel me through the year to come. Besides expanding greatly musically, I became a better person through the friends I met. I was fortunate enough to have a very outgoing roommate, which forced me to be outgoing too. Without her I would've probably spent my whole time there practicing and making reeds, which would be great, but having friends helps mentally. This camp really allowed me to find out a little more of who I really am. When I came back I found that I wasn't thinking about what to do next to be right, but just doing it because I was comfortable in my own skin.

So as these last few weeks of summer wrap up I continue to think of the future and the past. Being in my hometown during the end of summer and seeing the high school kids practicing for sports or marching band gets me thinking of when I was in that spot. There are some great memories, but I also think of how little I knew compared to now; how much I've grown in those three short years I've been removed. One can gain so much knowledge and experience from being removed from the bubble they grew up in. With that said, I grew up in undergrad too, so how much will I grow after next year when I'm in grad school and once again removed from the familiarity I began to call home?

The fall semester will be devoted to my senior recital. Luckily it's not my first recital, so I sort of know what to expect. Besides my recital I have to begin getting my applications together and audition material for the biggest challenge of the spring semester: AUDITIONS! This is probably what frightens me the most. I've chosen some big schools to apply to: Eastman, Yale, and Hartt. The first two send a small shiver down my spine thinking about them. Another part of me just wonders if those are the right choices for me, or if I'm just going with the norm. It's such a big decision that my mind gets lost somewhere in the middle. I'm sure though, the right thing for me will happen, as it did for undergrad.

Well, the summer is dwindling as I type this. If there are a few things I could list that I learned this summer I would say.... Let the people you care about know that you care about them, Work as hard as you can for what you want, and lastly HAVE FUN DOING WHATEVER IT IS YOU'RE DOING!!!